Wednesday, September 1, 2010

life and times of the job hunt

Sooo I've become very un-picky about job-hunting lately.

Translation? I was doing my due diligence and putting a face with a name and all that networking nonsense by bringing my resume and a cupcake to a local grocery store's bakery manager (I'm thinking I'm very clever at this point). I had already filled out an application online, this was just the proverbial icing on my bakery job cake. (I am also thinking I'm very clever just now at that bit of writing).

So, I march myself right up to the manager and introduce myself quite awkwardly.

Me: "Hi, I'm Jennie, I understand you know the Hennighausens."

Manger: (Response should go here)

Me: "Er, well, they are loyal patrons of this wonderful Kroger."

Manger: (Response should go here)

Me: (Clears throat...losing confidence) "Anyways, I just wanted to let you know that I applied online to the position open in the bakery and wanted to drop off this cupcake while I introduced myself personally so you could put a face with the name."

Suddenly, physics turned its ugly - but hitherto even unnoticed - back against me. All that I know and understand about gravity and/or my own bodily functionality changed.

As I finished the word "name" a bit of spittle flew from my mouth and landed on my cheek/eye area. I say it was a "bit," but let the records show that it was enough for me to need to wipe it away (two strokes), and for her to look down awkwardly at the cupcake, which now had just lost all appeal entirely.

I stood there blankly for an eternal 2.3 seconds before I then spouted out,

"You don't have to eat that."

I'm afraid my ill-timed spasm of the mouth might have shut that door.

Oh well.



Jordan said...

hahahah yESSSSSSS. I love it. So proud of you. ONWARD!

ordinaryday said...


I read this post out loud to Chris... he's said you were remarkably clever (including how your wrote your post!)

You. ARE. Funny.

layne said...

haha...AGGGGGHHHHHH. i think this has happened to me before--only change the characters, dates and times.