Hope

In Christ alone my hope is found,
He is my light, my strength, my song;
this Cornerstone, this solid Ground,
firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, what depths of peace,
when fears are stilled, when strivings cease!
My Comforter, my All in All,
here in the love of Christ I stand.

In Christ alone! who took on flesh
Fullness of God in helpless babe!
This gift of love and righteousness
Scorned by the ones he came to save:

Till on that cross as Jesus died,
The wrath of God was satisfied -

For every sin on Him was laid;
Here in the death of Christ I live.

There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain:
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave he rose again!
And as He stands in victory
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me,
For I am His and He is mine -
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.

No guilt in life, no fear in death,
This is the power of Christ in me;
From life's first cry to final breath.
Jesus commands my destiny.
No power of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home,
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand

new/old vision

if i could,
i would be paid to be a musician: violin, ukelele, harmonica, kazoo, whatever. there is just a life in music that i can't really explain, but only understand vaguely enough to pursue wildly.

i want to help people.

that sounds stupid and idealistic, but i do. at the very basis, i want my life to be in service for someone.

if i never had to reconcile a business account again, i wouldn't be sorry in the slightest.

i desire,
crave,
need,
adventure.

i think i have allowed myself to be lulled to sleep by the drone of passing cars in a city during rush hour, and have forgotten what adventure is. and it's true: my adventure may very well be in another 9 to 5 job, but i am certain no shrub is safe from wild attacks of imagination from here on out.

i want to be known as an intercessor.

i believe in the power and movement of prayer, and i want it to be something that defines me. the only answer i have ever found to be uncompromisingly true has been something i've discovered in prayer.

i still believe that i follow Christ

because

i

met

Him

and He changed me.

that may sound mystical or flimsy, but it's the Truth. i don't believe someone can be changed by imagination or even by their own will.

i

believe

it's

because

He

is

alive.

as backwards as this sounds - especially with a post with the majority of sentences beginning with "i" - i don't want my life to be about me. i've done that and it just turns into a self-pitying vortex of empty faster than i can take deep breaths to talk myself out of it.

i want it to be for someone.

for them in prayer.

for them in love.

for Him in life.

mercies new every morning

trust
in
the
LORD
with
all
your
heart
and lean not on your own understanding
and
in
all
your
ways
acknowledge
Him
and
He
will make your paths straight.

array me like a lily, Lord,
for i am
yours
alone.

"the eternal God is thy dwelling place
and underneath are the everlasting arms"
Deut. 33:27

loves

True selflessness is that my mom always sits facing the house.

If you sit outside, and your back is to the house, it is nothing but greens and browns and trees and sky.

If you sit outside and you face the house, it is siding, an unkempt garden and a broken porch.

There is only one seat that faces the house and she always puts herself there, while the rest of us talk gaily and enjoy a late summer dinner under the Lime Tree, with a view of gardens and trees and green.

We don't argue; She doesn't point it out.

But she always sits facing the house.

lines

When I don't see the miraculous, I have felt Him walking beside me still.
When my prayer is not answered, He remains a God who hears.
As I lean not on my own understanding, I am in awe of His generosity.
In times when I do not see breakthrough, I see Him in all things.


thank you for the stars,
and for light that we don't see

your kindness is from everlasting to everlasting,
and I walk daily in it.

thank you that your goodness is something I am apart of,
and thank you that it is something I can never understand.

lend me the grace to only walk beside you

Ha

I was musing over the weirdness/uncertainty of my life last night with my mom, and I found myself repeating words that I almost recognized, but wasn't quite sure where I had heard them from. I was talking (complaining/whining) about how I am trying to do things "right" and why then, would the Lord be withholding from me? What cause for this continual state of "waiting" or unknowing (or ignorance, whatever...)?

It wasn't until early this morning that i remembered that I had blogged a while ago about just such a scenario here.

Would I still praise His name when breakthrough/revelation/help didn't come? Holy hell. Maybe not? I mean, my praise these days is a kind of wimpy, half-hearted "thank you" to the God of the universe who still lets me breathe each day.

Woops?

I think I rebuke myself.

And I do praise you, Lord; for my health, for my family, for my best friends who are faithful to continue to pray for me, for my job, for MUSIC, for that lovely vacation that we had, for restoration, for healing, for my violin, for learning to walk with you, for your grace that covers me every.single.day, for crickets that chirp, for the early morning that's just quiet enough for me to hear from you, for giving your life for me. Hallelujah.

night walking

i've taken to late night walks.

So amazing.

It's turning point in my life that I have begun to really appreciate the joy and peace of early mornings and late nights.

i love walking outside when no one's around. there's something so very magical about night and the melodic sounds of crickets hidden by the darkness.

I've asked the Lord to walk with me during these night walks, and I think He has.

He's very quiet though.