happy birthday, jefe!

Holy moly. I'm tired. Kasey (the sister-in-law) and I and another of my brother's friend hijacked my John from work yesterday for his 30th birthday. He was subsequently blindfolded and taken skydiving. Then dinner with way too many people and karaoke afterward - John did an entire Snoop song (wound up so out of breath that a lung nearly collapsed, but still...). It was epic. And exhausting.

But it was worth it!

And I of course wanted to take this post to honor him on his 30th bday with a list of my favorite moments of all times with
John Stanley.

10. When I was jogging on the Bear Trail in college (It was the cool thing to do. Be seen. Be in shape.), John and his friend were driving past me. They decided it would be funny to swerve onto the curb to spook me while I was in the zone and not paying attention. They did. And in my ever-present agility and bodily awareness, I managed to trip, face plant and break my walkman. (YEAH, IT WAS A WALKMAN. SO?). John had to drive me home because I managed to hurt my hip in the incident. THANKS A LOT, JOHN.

9. My freshman year at Baylor, all three of us older siblings were at the same school. It was epic (not for my parents....), in that literally, everything I said or did wound up coming back to them. I hated/loved that. Being a naive little freshman, I went out to a frat party with some nice guy that I met in the Baylor Symphony. (He was a first-chair bassist - how dangerous could he be??). I was being cool, hanging and the party, minding my own business, when in stomps Mark (second oldest brother). He walks straight up to me (in mid-awesome dance move) and says,
"Jennie. This is the worst place you could be." I was so confused. I brushed him off saying, "What are you talking about? This is Kevin, he's nice!" Mark stomped out of the room. Two minutes later, he walks in, cell phone in hand. He shoved it in my face.

"Hello?" I answered.
"Jennie!" John's voice barked, "That is the absolute worse place you could be right now. You need to leave immediately."

I literally was so confused. How did they even know where I was? I mean, it's a fairly large campus, and I didn't regularly check in with them on my Friday night plans. Whatever. I stomped out of the party, humiliated, with Mark trailing behind me, making sure I went safely home to my freshman dorm. Apparently, that fraternity was infamous for slipping things in girls' drinks. Who knew? Later, when I was a little more aware of the social dynamics at Baylor, I realized, that was the worst possible place I could be. Ha. I most certainly DID NOT thank them then, but came to gratitude later.

8. This moment. I don't even remember it, but I love it.

For some reason, it reminds me of a time in college when I had a pretty dramatic anxiety attack - I called John (of course) and he came over while I cried and cried. He ended up sleeping on the couch in the living room and praying for me that night. What can I say? He's good at comforting sisters while they sleep.

7. Going to Haiti with John and a group of people he had helped organize back in 2007. I got to see him walking out as a leader who led with humility, hilarity and wisdom. His heart for the nations and for God's purposes in him and others is astounding. I've been on a few mission trips, and I think he was my favorite leader - the jefe! He was of course responsible and wise, but also a doofus and a lot of fun.

6. The morning Josh passed away, John was the first person I called. Sobbing and so scared, I will never forget what he told me. I had been so afraid of the fact that Josh went to hell, and all John said was,

"Jennie. Our only hope is that when we get to heaven, God will look at us and say, 'I'm more gracious and more loving than you could ever imagine.'"

I love that John lives out that truth. That our God is more kind, loving and gracious than we could even hope for. When John talks about his Jesus, he knows Him.

5. The face that John married one of my best friends, Kasey. I think who you choose for a mate says a lot about who you are. She is sweet, gracious and so kind - maybe some of John's more latent traits. HA. I love that he found for himself a sweet friend and companion and love for him to travel through life together with. They are awesome!

4. When I played in the Baylor symphony, the concert hall was posh and refined. And then there was my ape brothers and their friends acting a fool in the back row. Fist pumping and dancing, they were there to cheer me on at my first college performance. Sweet brothers. John even sent me flowers that day for the event. :)

3. The fact that whenever he says he loves me he always says, "I love you so much it makes me angry." HA. Jefe wouldn't be Jefe without unexplained, unavoidable angst.

2. The day before John left for college, I remember being so so sad. It was this weird moment of realization that our life as a family was about to change (haha...little did I know that we'd all end up at college together later...HA). John, being the sap and sensitive guy (he is hidden by a demeanor of a heart that's 3 sizes too small), played Garth Brooks' "Your Song" for us and as we all sat around and cried. I don't think I've even heard the song since then, but all I remember is that he was telling us that he loved us in his own way.

1. The endless, pointless, redundant jokes that we beat mercilessly to the ground. Jefe's humor is like mine: strange and a little distorted, and maybe slightly inappropriate. He likes awkward humor almost as much as I do. I LOVE it! It keeps me laughing whenever we are together, whether in the slums of Haiti or in the metropolis of Dallas. He is so much fun to be with. I appreciate that humor allows us never to take ourselves too seriously.

I love you, John!
I KNOW that this new year will bring new and amazing things for you and Kasey. As you walk forward, I'm praying that you'll find new life as a leader, a father, a friend and a son of God. Your gifts are irrevocable (no matter how hard you try) and
the calling God has on your life is as plain as the deviated septum in your nose.
Hopefully, you'll get over your awkwardness
as you leave your 20s.
If not, at least I'll be hear to remind you it's still there.

For you this year:

"Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."

Psalm 73:25-26.

congrats, pea!!!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKK
Lovely Jill is getting marrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrriiied.
EEK. I am so excited for them.
Jill is one of the most gentle, gracious, (sneakily hilarious)people
that I know
and I am SO glad she has found love and life
and will be getting hitched in the near future.

(please ignore weirdness of my face in above picture, pea, it couldn't be helped. I need one of
you and Brison!!)

Can't wait for you to be "Mrs. Pea Williams"

"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."
I Corinthians 13: 1- 13

things not to communicate over IM

“I mistakenly told them you had Gonorrhea.”

She said that and then smiled. Her cheeks were like little cumulus clouds of delight as she found such humor in the mishap that managed to land me somewhere in the land of wild, unbridled promiscuity and her in the unaffected audience of the theatre of my demise. I wanted to punch the life out of those clouds. Not really. But, well, really.

It had come to my attention that sometime earlier in the week, after I had left the office building where I was temp-to-hire, my friend alerted the office that I had Gonorrhea in a horribly disastrous attempt to correctly name the tropical disease I contracted when I went overseas. (Noted here that the disease was called “Dengue Fever.” My friend told me later, “I just got stuck on the ‘G’ and then couldn’t get out of it!”)

Nonetheless, after things were cleared up (with a few over the counter meds and a vitamin regimen), I needed to make a point to talk to the HR manager about the full-time position they’d offered earlier in the week.

Enter: The intra-office Instant Message (IM) program used both professionally and unprofessionally by the office staff. Often the program is used in an effort to be polite and allow mildly-pressing business discussions to be submitted via IM and then responded to when convenient.

I then, took the opportunity to IM the human resources manager to ask if there was a time - at her convenience - when we could discuss the impending job offer in order to clarify roles and salary.

Jennie to HR manager: "Hey, when you get a minute, can we talk about the receptionist offer?"

HR manager to Jennie: "Oh yeah. About that. We've decided we don't want to move Elisa from her current position." {inserted FROWN-Y FACE}

Jennie to HR manager: “Oh. Haha.”

End of chat.

My own meagre "haha" was merely a cursory response to answer in like light-hearted terms. I literally had no idea what I was supposed to say to the fact that the job they offered was now un-offered over intra-office IM and with an, albeit empathetic, emoticon.

:( says: Goodbye income, goodbye benefits. Goodbye autonomy and ability to pay off debt. Goodbye Christmas. Goodbye Birthdays. Goodbye job offers and 401Ks. Goodbye stability. Goodbye steady regimes. Goodbye freedom from anti-anxiety medicines.

Hmm. I thought. It’s interesting though that despite the more-than slightly devastating news, the frowny face DID make me feel a bit better. Cheap empathy, maybe. But how would I have felt if she would have delivered that line WITHOUT the frowny face? Terrible! So, I continued with my temp work and reasoned, especially after I heard the Gonorrhea story, that their disinclination to hire me was not entirely unfounded.

During that same temp-to-hire stint, I worked in my brother’s office. We are pretty close, as family goes, and generally have been known to enjoy one another’s company. However, until working with him in the office setting, I had no idea that he maintained such an air of stodgy professionalism at all times. This obviously was hard to swallow since I had in my immediate possession some incriminating pictures of a certain office professional’s buttocks as he streaked through a Phi Chi party my sophomore year of college. At any rate, I played a few mild pranks on him during that time. Nothing detrimental or too distracting, but fun nonetheless.

Since he had a fetish with floss, I decided that should obviously work in my favor in my little pranks. One night I swiped one before I left and let it find a new home in a Jell-O mold that subsequently found its way into the office refrigerator with a large sign with his name on it. After the Jell-O mold-ed floss was planted, I plodded diligently along in my cubicle, waiting for the fun.

{overheard}HR manager: “John, I think someone just pulled a Dwight Schrute on you. I’m thinking maybe Jennie.”

John {walks to Jennie’s cubicle}: “Jennie, what did you do?”

I could see the big vein coming out of his forehead already.

Jennie: “What?”

John: “Did you put something in Jell-o?”

I couldn't smile yet, so I made myself think of something sad, like the fact that most of my college friends still can't differentiate between "your" and "you're" or my dog that died in second grade.

Jennie: “What in Jell-o?”

John: “I don’t know, in the break room?”

Jennie: “Huh?”

John: “Did you put a piece of office equipment in Jell-o?”

Jennie: “No.”

I answered sure and swift. He turned and marched so bow-leggedly to the break room that I was sure he was going to accidentally pivot on an axis.

HR manager: {peaks in Jennie’s cubicle}

Jennie: {smiles}

HR manager: {sits back at her cubicle}

John: {plops down Jell-O mold/mound container, now half-empty} “Where’s the top?" he said in a hoarse whisper, “Jennie, this is too soon. Are you trying to get fired?!”

My favorite vein of his to monitor was pulsating visibly now to the beat of something like "Hammer Time."

Jennie: {looks up meekly} “It wasn’t a piece of office equipment.”

life and times of the job hunt

Sooo I've become very un-picky about job-hunting lately.

Translation? I was doing my due diligence and putting a face with a name and all that networking nonsense by bringing my resume and a cupcake to a local grocery store's bakery manager (I'm thinking I'm very clever at this point). I had already filled out an application online, this was just the proverbial icing on my bakery job cake. (I am also thinking I'm very clever just now at that bit of writing).

So, I march myself right up to the manager and introduce myself quite awkwardly.

Me: "Hi, I'm Jennie, I understand you know the Hennighausens."

Manger: (Response should go here)

Me: "Er, well, they are loyal patrons of this wonderful Kroger."

Manger: (Response should go here)

Me: (Clears throat...losing confidence) "Anyways, I just wanted to let you know that I applied online to the position open in the bakery and wanted to drop off this cupcake while I introduced myself personally so you could put a face with the name."

Suddenly, physics turned its ugly - but hitherto even unnoticed - back against me. All that I know and understand about gravity and/or my own bodily functionality changed.

As I finished the word "name" a bit of spittle flew from my mouth and landed on my cheek/eye area. I say it was a "bit," but let the records show that it was enough for me to need to wipe it away (two strokes), and for her to look down awkwardly at the cupcake, which now had just lost all appeal entirely.

I stood there blankly for an eternal 2.3 seconds before I then spouted out,

"You don't have to eat that."

I'm afraid my ill-timed spasm of the mouth might have shut that door.

Oh well.

ONWARD!

grateful heart

In spending time with the Lord today, I was OVERWHELMED with how generous He has been through others to me.

I am so thankful for life here at 6918. I am thankful that I have a lovely space to call my own; a place to bake incessantly; a family to sit around the dinner table with; and laughs to be shared constantly.

I am so grateful for the help/advice/instruction from FLH on budgeting/finances. I am thankful to be learning principles of saving and of simplicity because of it.

I am so thankful to those who believe in me and who give generously to allow me to pursue counseling without incurring further debt.

I am so so thankful and humbled by friends who pray regularly, consistently for me in the secret places with our Heavenly Father.

I am thankful that my sweet brother and sister-in-law are generous with me even in their own need (because of which, I now have lovely, freezing, air conditioning in my car!!).

I am grateful for my job that is life-giving and FUN.

I am thankful to Suz and Sean and Corinne and John who gave computers to me!!!

I am thankful to the FLH and MGH who celebrate half-birthdays.

I am so so thankful for my health and the health of my family.

I am so thankful that my Heavenly Father continually reminds me that the lilies toil nor spin, but are arrayed more splendidly than Solomon. I am thankful that He wanted Mary to just sit as His feet.

I know that His gifts are more than physical, but I am SO THANKFUL for the ones that are.

today's page in my journal

good grief.
before I forget and have to do more dang character development,
I wanted to write a few things down.

This is what I know:

- everyone has a perspective, a background, a history, a frame of reference and it probably involves some amount of hurt or need or suffering that I couldn't understand.

-death to flesh hurts sometimes

- "His ways are higher." His thoughts are not my thoughts.

-His 'goodness' may not look like monetary or physical means.

- I have a roof over my head

- I can usuallly find something to be grateful for (or repent of)

- sanctification is not really a pretty process (at least for me)

for sister.

i made these for my sister for her 17th birthday. wow. she is such an adult. UGH.
they're little pins to decorate shirts, jackets, hats, bags. the white one with the band is a headband.
hopefully, she will love them.

because i love her.

happy birthday, sister.